The Treasure Lies in the Chair
What IS it that women really want? This is an age-old question that poses the possibility that it is perhaps possible to know what would make a woman—any woman—happy. Perhaps it is only possible to know the answer if you’re a woman and if, as a woman, you actually know what YOU want. So much of the time we don’t know what we want. We think we want what SHE has on TV or what our PERFECT friend seems to have, only to find that it isn’t attainable—at least not in our own reality and therefore we find ourselves unhappy. Well, I am not psychologist or claim to know exactly what women want but, I can speak from my experience and that of what I can see around me. I’d like to suggest that you don’t have to be a woman to know the answer to this age-old question. You just have to want to know the answer and be willing to work at achieving it in your relationship.
When I met my future husband’s parents for the first time, my father-in-law-to-be left an indelible mark on my heart and my memory. I walked up to their front door and was greeted by him and his wife. He threw his arm around her with a huge smile and boldly claimed, “This is the love of MY life!” In all my life I had never known any one to be so “in love,” especially at their age (I was just 22 and they were in their 60’s, which seemed ancient to me). I know now why they BOTH had what they wanted. First and foremost, he cherished her. I liken it to a chair (chair-ish), with side arms. Like a chair, he holds her up, he wraps her with encouragement, stability, faithfulness, time, conversation, and care. He makes her comings and goings comfortable, giving her confidence in herself as he treasures her. His absolute first priority is to hold her up with highest regard, esteem and honor, to meet her needs emotionally and physically. Now here’s the clincher, she may not be worthy of such actions all of the time, but he does it any way. That is what it means to cherish. That is what my father-in-law did for my mother-in-law and what caused her to want to go to unimaginable lengths to care for him during the grueling years of his terminal illness later in his life. For some reason he knew how to do this and by his actions alone he passed it on to his son, my husband.